A Guide To Carrying Multiple Titles Without Looking Like An Idiot

*Originally published July 2014. Updated August 2015.

Professional wrestling used to be all about the titles, but that has changed over the years. Today, they can often be a burden. They can become governors that slow the speed of a rising star. Worse yet, they can become permanent rest stops on that road.

But the burden of carrying a championship title is never more apparent these days than when one watches professional wrestlers forced to carry more than one at a time. It's not always pretty. It's often awkward. Sometimes, it's downright ugly.

"Here Ric, I'm sick of carrying this one."

During a Monday Night Raw in July 2014, John Cena handed the "Big Gold Belt" over to Ric Flair. There was hope that perhaps the days of Cena being forced to drag around two title belts just to prove that he's the WWE World Heavyweight Champion were over. Sadly, the gesture was merely symbolic. Cena would continue serving his sentence, and sporting his "belt scarf", whenever he appeared on WWE television.

That's not a smile. That's a grimace.

Poor Daniel Bryan literally buckled under the weight of carrying WWE's two massive world championship belts. It may not be the sole reason for his injury issues, but it certainly couldn't have helped. Still, one must give Bryan credit. He was wise enough to know one of those belts must go around his waist.

Must. Not. Look. Tired.

Bryan never perfected the art of carrying two championship belts (we'll chalk that up to lack of practice), but he definitely outperformed his predecessor.

Everyone else: "Better you than me!"

Poor Randy Orton. After he won the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, his entrance became a painfully slow parade of awkwardness.

As time went on, simply navigating those two monstrosities into the ring became an impossible challenge for Orton. Eventually, he gave up and just started chucking them under the bottom rope before he stepped into the ring himself. That is how big of a pain in the ass those two belts are!

But let's not be too hard on Randy. When it comes to the troublesome transportation of championship belts, one man stands alone.

Best In The World At What He Does (Excludes carrying championship title belts)

Chris Jericho made history in late 2001 when he became the first WWE Undisputed Champion. The following night, a tortorous era began for both he and WWE television viewers when he was formally presented with the two bulky championship belts that came along with the title.

Those two belts. They just overwhelmed Chris Jericho's shoulders, and in the following weeks he somehow managed to make things even harder on himself. He chose to keep the belts fastened while he carried each on one arm. It was a damn disaster.

I can still hear myself yelling at the television, "Chris, just wear one of them around your waist! You won't have to constantly fiddle with them while you're cutting promos!" Did he ever listen? Did he ever learn his lesson?

Nope.

So, what have we learned from this exercise? Carrying two championship belts at the same time is damn near impossible to pull off with any kind of tact. The obvious answer would appear to be giving the professional wrestler fewer belts to carry, but that may not necessarily be the best course of action.

Perhaps, what the professional wrestler needs is more.

You suck.

That bad man up there is Ultimo Dragon. There was a time when he appeared to be the holder of just about every professional wrestling title on the planet. Things came to a head in October 1996, when he won the whopping 8-title J-Crown in Japan.

It was quite the scene when he rolled into WCW Monday Nitro with all that gold. Not long after, in December 1996, he added the WCW Cruiserweight Championship. In doing so, he established a record in professional wrestling for holding the most concurrent championships. 10 titles. 10!

"Pardon me while I remove my 10 championship belts."

When it came time to haul all those belts around, Ultimo Dragon pulled it off with ease, sometimes employing manager Sonny Ono, a fleet of attractive women or even a small child to help him out.

Many professional wrestlers struggle with two belts. Ultimo had 10, and there was absolutely nothing awkward about it. In case you've forgotten, here's a video of Ultimo Dragon kicking ass, and taking more years off of Rey Mysterio's career.

Not buying this suggestion? Look how good someone like The Miz looks holding three championship belts.

I rest my case.

Yep. What we need is more. 10 belts is awesome, but clearly adding just one could be a big improvement. In conclusion, I recommend WWE add a third title belt to what the WWE World Heavyweight Champion must carry around. I'll even offer a suggestion.

Boom.

UPDATE! We've had some notable new additions to the "multiple title carrying" club over recent months. First, Ring Of Honor's Jay Lethal added the ROH World Title to the ROH Television Title he was already holding. He's been putting a belt on each shoulder, which others have tried, but failed to execute properly. You have to hand it to Lethal, he seems to be pulling this difficult move off with little difficulty.

"I make it look easy!"

Also currently hauling around two championship belts is WWE's Seth Rollins. If his first night carrying both the WWE World Heavyweight Championship and the United States Championship is any indication, he's going to do a great job. He's a natural, with the U.S. Title around his waist, and WWE's top prize free to do whatever he feels like doing with it. He could probably handle a third title, if necessary. Nicely done, Seth!

The 1,161st edition of @WWE #RAW is LIVE NOW on @USA_Network! And BOOM!! @WWERollins is #TheMan! #SummerSlam pic.twitter.com/UyS7kzJijY

— WWE (@WWE) August 25, 2015